pornochromatic

A question I’ve been asked a lot is “How can I get my significant other to watch porn with me?” I think porn can be a fun treat to add to a couple’s sex life if introduced in a way that everyone is comfortable and turned on by. But how to accomplish this? Here are my Do’s and Don’ts:

Note: Usually, it’s guys who do the asking, so I’ve written it for a man in a relationship with a woman. I think it’s applicable to any kind of relationship though.

DO make it a relationship-building activity
Women love a thoughtful man. Especially ones that come up with ways to improve their relationships with their partners. Tell her you think that watching some porn together would be fun and bring you closer together. Then follow the rest of my Do’s and Don’ts and make sure it does.

DO choose an appropriate film
There are a lot of people who think that women want to watch costumed features with lots of “plot” and gentle lovemaking. I disagree. Women (just like men) want to watch whatever turns them on. So let her choose. My suggestions for options you can suggest are at the end of this article.

DON’T react negatively to her choice
There are two possible scenarios here:

1. She picks the most softcore, boring movie she can possibly find. Look at it as a step in the right direction and avoid making it seem like you’re disappointed. If you play this right, maybe next time, she’ll be comfortable watching something XXX.

2. She finds the guts to tell you that she’d like to watch something harder. Perhaps a double penetration or some bondage. It might go without saying, but don’t make her feel like a filthy pervert. Show some enthusiasm and be open-minded. This is probably a very good thing!

DO pay attention to her while you’re watching
Remember, this is a couples activity. Stroke her hair, kiss her, tell her how sexy she is. Whatever you can do to make her comfortable with the fact that you guys are doing this together and that you’re far more interested in her than the girl on the screen. In fact, showing her a little oral love while she watches will go a long way toward proving that watching porn together is a fun and exciting activity.

DON’T say anything about the actress(es)
This is so important that it should be the first thing I wrote. Commenting on how the women you’re watching look or act is likely to make your lady self-conscious and possibly insecure. If she’s a size 12 and you happen to be watching some tiny little nymph on-screen, you don’t want her thinking that you wish she’d lose some weight. If nothing else, it will definitely ruin the fun.

DO give her the remote
Let’s be honest. Porn gets really boring at times. Empower her to use the fast forward button. That way, she can skip boring stuff *and* things that might make her uncomfortable (ex: gaping asses).

IF ALL ELSE FAILS
Sometimes these things can get awkward. Just turn the movie off and let her know it’s no big deal if she’s not really in the mood for that kind of thing right now – you can have fun without porn too.

Recommendations for couples porn watching
I’ll likely do a longer post about this, but a few places to start looking for things that you and your ladyfriend can enjoy together are:

• Digital Playground – Some decent features as well as good, high-quality vignette movies
• Comstock Films – Their movies are in sort of a documentary style. Not for everyone, but good for folks looking for “real” sex in their porn.
• Classics – Movies like The Opening of Misty Beethoven or Debbie Does Dallas.
• Harder stuff – Some ladies like it a little more hardcore. Female faves like Gianna Michaels and Belladonna can be good choices here.